Focus on your passions, not getting the girl

Your focus is not on getting the girl
Attracting (rather than chasing) women into your life is a chicken-and-egg concept:

Do you build an interesting lifestyle because women are in it, or do you live an interesting lifestyle that attracts women toward it?

It can work both ways, but the results in your life are generally better when you build the cool lifestyle you've always wanted to live while attracting women into it.

Why it works

If you life an interesting life filled with passion, women can sense it and be drawn to it. You live your life for, but you are also passionate about bringing new women and people into your life.

Better yet, you are not trying to impress her and can easily live life without her. You have the social skills to bring her into your life, but it's an open invitation for her to follow through on.

It gives you more breadth and depth

When you're pursuing your passions in your career and interests, you're building more potential points to connect with a woman on.

So if you are passionate about art exhibits, wine tasting, wind surfing, and indoor rock climbing, it gives more things for you two to have in common. If not, she can always relate to what you're describing or have a friend who has the same interest.

By living your life, you develop a depth of character by gaining more life experience and learning more things to share with her. There will always be experiences for you to share with her.

In summary

1. Live your life and aim to bring new women into your life.

2. Study basic social skills and pickup (there's A TON of material out there - start with David D., Pickup101, Real Social Dynamics, and Real Modern Man just to name a few).

3. Find your passions and pursue them.

4. Be open-minded about sharing your experiences with people around you, especially women.